Saturday 24 March 2012

A Twanasazi's Oxford dream....

Anyone who knows me well they would know by now that I since I have come here Irarely leave to any where special or any particular lecture or class without my tasbeeh around my wrist.
It's special because it's my father's tasbeeh. I have this feeling that when wearing it I am given strength, I am making right decisions… it maybe just an illusion but somehow it does make me feel empowered, safe and successful. The point is, my dear reader, being so far away from home, a little girl (bird, in dad's words) all alone, when this tasbeeh goes with me, it means today is a challenge, I am living a new experience – but I am not alone.
The University of Oxford has always been my dream. Every young girl would dream being in front of the mirror in a white dress as a Cinderella or whatever, but from the day I knew what Oxford is, I have always had it as a dream. A dream to be a student in Oxford (actually,  I once had a dream I was a graduate of Oxford Class of 2016). One of those dreams that I like to imagine myself living before I sleep every now and then or something I like to talk about with loves ones.
I would tell those close to me, I wish to be a student there for just one day in my life* today, my dear reader, I went to Oxford. The city that was beyond my dreams I walked in its road, breathed its air and touched the buildings. I looked at its sky and shopped at its shops. I was living something that I had only imagined in my mind.
I went with a dear friend, AA, I would walk, point at an elderly man, with white hair (actually 80% bold) and glasses and say: "Oh My God, I swear he is an Oxford professor." I would see a group of students and think, "wow, I’m sure they're Oxford students," I walked pass the colleges and took pictures.  For you, my dear reader, this is something simple; for me, it was one of those proud moments in my life. For some reason I am back in my room in Nottingham wanting to study so much and work so hard, maybe, just maybe… MAYBE… one day… one day sometime, at some age…. I might not be going to Oxford to take pictures and breathe in the air but to………..(Shhhh… I can't even complete this sentence).
As a twanasazi student, studying at Nottingham, today something became reality that was on many occasions beyond my dreams. Not an Oxford student, but walking through Oxford's roads. At points I would touch the tasbeeh. "I wish you were here with me… can you believe I am here…I am loving this…you embedded this dream within me" I would talk in my mind as I reached my hand to to it just to make sure it was there.

Who would have thought, with a grandfather cut off from the world, a father who spent most his life in the mountains would have a daughter who would walk the streets of Oxford... something that was always at the back of her mind. Dreams of young Kurds are starting to come true
*I never applied. 
Special thanks to the beautiful AA for joining me on this trip. 

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