My dearest....
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| Jezhntan piroz bet! (Happy Eid) I did this today |
Anonymous (and Kulka) who happen to read this and write a comment every now and then
Tonight marked the end of Ramadan and tomorrow back home the celebrations begin. I say back home because here I don't feel the Jezhn (Eid) spirit. Tomorrow, like any other day I will go to the study room and sit behind the laptop, books and papers all day (not that I mind).
Having said this I must admit I miss home and family, I miss having guests and going and visiting family. I miss the cousins (and their kids) visiting. I miss waking up and receiving hugs and kisses from my parents (when it comes to these things I am still a child).
But then there are the little things that make me smile. The name of some important people in my life appear on my phone, inbox messages, emails, and BlackBerry voice notes are helping- BIG TIME.
As I sit here knowing there is a very long night ahead of me (I want to reach a certain section of my dissertation so maybe I can go out with some friends on Monday. I have promised myself if I reach that target then I will treat myself) I am thinking of how next Jezhn is going to be. Where will I be? What will I be doing?
Wish you a great evening
Saza- smiling! I have every reason to smile!
Wooow! We both appreciate the special address to us (rigth Mr/Ms Anonymous?).
ReplyDeleteAs i am a bit better then last time (although still unsure about the final condition of my heart) - one short phone call can be a miracle:) - so i would like to say first of all jazhni piroz be - although i know its not the same as at home. I can imagine its difficult - specialy if its for the first time. But maybe thanks to that experience the next Eid - with the family at home - is going to be more happy than it used to be before. Some situations just teach us to appreciate what we had, what we can still have again.
Now Kulka will make a confession regarding that:
i used to get angry with someone for no reason - but now when this person is far and i miss him more then i could imagine - i want to tell him sorry for being so nasty and stupid.
So this how we learn to appreciate what we have.
Again i write too much? :)
Kulka...
DeleteAlways love reading your comments. Just once advice. Even though I don't know you I want to tell you if anyone does not appreciate you then do not beg for them to be in your life. Every woman deserves to be loved and appreciated. Give your heart time to heal, do great things, and don't stick to that one place where any person (whether friend, family or lover) left you.
Jezhni tosh piroz bet.
Sazan Xan,
DeleteHe appreciates me, he treats me in such a wonderful way, as nobody never treated me. But i had to loose him - its not his fault, absolutely not his fault. I said its my fault, but actually its nobody's fault. I lost him, although we have never been together, he didnt left me, so i should say i lost my hopes. Coz he still is ready to be by my side any time i will need him - but not as my man.
My heart was closed for everyone, i never supposed i will have such feelings for anyone in my life again. But it happened. But i will repeat again - its not his fault that he cant give me the same feelings in return. My mind understands that. But my heart...
We certainly do appreciate it :) I am happy that we can provide you even just a little bit of joy during this time of hard work and sacrifice.
ReplyDeleteIt is really strange when you are in a place where they don't celebrate holidays like you would at home. I remember a few years ago being on holiday with a friend in Turkey over Christmas. Back home the Christmas season is everywhere - the shopping malls advertise it from December, there are lights and decorations up in the streets, my Mother would usually run the church Christmas service, and there would be a big gathering of family for a nice meal and presents. In Turkey, there was nothing - it was just another day (although we did see a frightening bug-eyed santa claus model in a shop). My friend and I spent the day in a minivan travelling. But that night, we went to a nice restaurant for a meal (a big change from our normal method of eating as cheaply as possible) to celebrate together. Holy days are what you make of them, what your attitude is. I don't know exactly how that translates for Eid, but I hope your time with friends on Monday includes a nice meal :)
One thing I can say for certain is that if an anonymous reader of your blog is proud of you, think how much more your close friends and family must be proud of you. When you get home, I am sure you will receive plenty of affection to make up for what you're missing out on now.
Dear Anonymous....
DeleteI don't like referring to you as Anonymous, even though I know you must be someone successful, intellectual, and an ambitious person as well. May you spend every Christmas with friends and loves ones. You know what this Eid taught me? It is never about the type of food you eat, the clothes you wear or the gifts you receive. It is ONLY about who you are with. It is times like this that allows me to appreciate family and loved ones more and more....
And yes, I could not do what I am doing now without an entire group of special individuals behind me giving me their full support, love, encouragement and motivation. Everyday.